A little catch up

So, I am actually posting this at night...I know, but it's because I have been off of the computer for two days. Another gall stone attack...all my fault. I just wasn't thinking. I went out to eat and ordered one of my favorite meals (french dip). As I finished the last bite, I thought to myself...now why did you order that? All meat -NOT GOOD. And sure enough within a few hours of eating it the attack started. So, I was out of commission for a whole day again. Pretty much my weekend was shot AGAIN.

Now I am going to take control of my week and do my best to accomplish things on my list...which means I may not be posting much this week, but you never know what will inspire me.

We actually found out at our Dr.'s appt this week what we are having, but we decided since it's so close we're going to make it a surprise for everyone else. It did enable us to go shopping for an outfit to take the baby home in today. We found the cutest thing, on the clearance rack. Plus, I had a few dollars left on a gift card that I was able to use. Now, I have something to wash and pack in the bag I MUST pack this week. Very exciting!

Because of the attack, I did not get my haircut so hopefully something will work out this week to get that done, because I really don't want to go into labor with my current hair. Too thick, too full and too, too much. Also, I really want to color it after it gets cut before labor. Fingers crossed!

No More HOARDING...on the inside

After two days of being laid up with the stomach flu and spending time recovering from all the aches and pains associated with it I am back on countdown to baby. Am really wondering if the baby has dropped because the lower pressure has really increased today. I keep hoping this little one will stay in until it's due date, but at the same time I am not sure if it's going to happen. Last appointment with our regular OB on Friday...although we have a few more scheduled after that with some others.

The renewed feeling of energy today reminds me of one of my favorite scriptures and it will be my focus today.

Psalm 103:1-5

1Bless the LORD, O my soul;

And all that is within me, bless His holy name!

2 Bless the LORD, O my soul,

And forget not all His benefits:

3 Who forgives all your iniquities,

Who heals all your diseases,

4 Who redeems your life from destruction,

Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies,

5 Who satisfies your mouth with good things,

So that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

Try saying that first verse over and over with different inflections and volumes. I can't believe how much it centers me. When I do this I call to the deep part inside of me. What does it mean -and ALL that is within me-? What is all? Are there parts of me that I have been holding back from God? I don't want there to be, but every time I go here I find something else. Maybe they are new things...maybe things really old and deeply buried. Whatever they are they need to come into the light and bless the name of the Lord! I think this is a good exercise to do every few weeks or months. Getting yourself cleaned out is like cleaning out your house. Have you ever watched that show Hoarders? I think people do that in their lives too. We hoard garbage inside of ourselves until we aren't even aware of what we are doing. Some things may be valuable, but are buried so deeply by other junk that we can't make use of it. Some things just need to be disposed of. We need to clean ourselves out regularly so we don't become hoarders of junk inside.

Looking forward to a day of cleaning...both inside myself and in my house!

Dear Lord - I bless Your name today. Help me to do it with ALL that is within me. Help me to rid myself of junk so that ALL that is within me is good stuff worthy of being a part of Your vessel. You are such an amazing God! Thank you for all you've done for me!

Where is my mind?

I am going to continue on with my Proverbs 31 woman goals, but I don't want to go too fast. It's too important to me, so that will only be a weekly part of my post. I want to spend time focusing on each goal and really changing my life.

I have so many areas of my life that I want to improve and make better that it feels like I could spend all my time writing about. But the scripture I am focusing on today is Philippians 4:8-9 which reads - Summing it all up friends, I'd say you'll do your best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious -the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into His most excellent harmonies.

Which means today that I am focusing on the good only. I will not be taken down by anything else.

So, what can I focus on? For starters, my God! The Creator of the universe has taken His time to create me. I am a creation of the most high God. When I really think about that it makes me take my view off of my failures and shortcomings because I was made by HIM. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. It's easy to think about that when we think about kids and babies, but what about thinking about that when we think about us. We aren't missing anything. He has not failed in making us. He has not failed in making me. WOW! Changes the way you look at yourself when you really think about it. And all the things He has done. Too numerous to name, too numerous to count, but amazing as you focus all that He is!

My children - God has known them before He formed them in my womb. He has prepared a way for them. I heard a great quote and even though I do not know who said it I am applying it to all of my children. -You're going to take long strides on the surface of this earth and with every step you're going to change the world.- I feel like God has told me to claim this for my kids. They are such a gift to me. Over and over the Bible mentions how blessed a man is that has a quiver full of arrows (a bunch of kids). With one already and another one coming shortly we are feeling even more and more blessed!

Just focusing on these two things today will fill my mind and heart with joy!

Thank you God for who You are and that You never change! Thank You that I can trust You completely. My life is in your hands. Please help me to keep my mind focused on You and everything You have for me. I love You!

A Proverbs 31 woman?

Every time I read Proverbs 31 I feel a bit overwhelmed. Is it really possible for this woman to exist? And is it really possible for me to be this woman? It must be. I just need to discover how. Perhaps if I break it down into goals and try to accomplish one at a time...

GOAL ONE - A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it.

I really do believe that my husband has every reason to trust me, but I guess I think there are areas in my life that I want to make sure he never even has to think about if I did something he asked or kept up on my part of our home care. SO my goal for this upcoming week will be to re-examine every area of my life and see if there is anything I can improve upon in regards to areas Jordan trusts me to take care of. Am I falling short? Are things okay? How can I go above and beyond?

Anyone have any ideas?

Lord - You know all and see all. Help me to look at my life and see areas for improvement. I want to be all you created me to be. I want to live out my life reflecting you, especially to my family. Teach me what it means to be a totally trustworthy person in every area of my life, not just the ones that are easily seen. I want to be just like You are. Open my eyes to see if I really trust You without reserve. If there are areas of my life that I don't trust You in, help me to. I believe the only way I can be the kind of wife I want to be is to really know and reflect You.

Thank You for your patience with me. Thank You for working with my clay again and shaping me into Your vessel! I love You Lord.

Ask, Seek, Knock

Honestly, after the great morning I had yesterday you would think that I would look positively on getting up early this morning. I guess in my mind I had getting up early as after 6AM at least, especially while I am pregnant. However, after getting up 2 times in the night to put Liam back in bed (plus all my bathroom waking up) and then having to deal with Jordan's snoring every time in order to fall back to sleep I was not thrilled to have Liam come in wide awake at 5:20 this morning. I probably could have gotten him back to sleep, but Jordan was already in the bathroom getting ready and the light spurred on Liam's desire to be awake. I am so exhausted. I do not want to be grumpy or angry, but in some ways I am so jealous of Jordan. He sleeps through everything...doesn't need to get up & pee several times a night and doesn't have to deal with a toddler who DID NOT get enough sleep. I wonder if we are putting Liam to bed to early. Actually, I think he still needs two naps a day, but refuses. He slept so much better when he was still doing 2.

Okay, enough complaining. Sometimes you just have to get a little out of your system, but I choose to move on from that place. It is my choice. Today is a new day. I'm sure I will find plenty of opportunities to be thankful and grateful if I just focus on looking for them.

In fact, looking at Liam's bright little smile is enough to put a smile on my face. I will forget my dreams (they weren't so great) from last night and turn my eyes to the Son that I might see light and brightness all around me. I also have the chance to get more crossed off my list because of all this extra non-sleeping time. Perhaps Jordan will take the initiative and let me have a little sleep in this weekend.

My scripture to focus on today -

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.”-Matthew 7:7 & 8

My prayer for today -

Lord, I thank you for this new day! I ask today that I will see you in all that I do. Help me to seek you in the little moments of today, not just the big adventures. I am knocking at your door; let it be open to me so I might walk through into all You've called me to. Thank You for my beautiful son. Help me to teach him to ask, seek and knock that he might know You more than just a story, but an actual person that he can have a real relationship with. Thank You for my amazing husband. Give him peace and joy as he goes about his day today. Let him feel Your presence as He interacts with others and help him to exude You. Thank You for this baby growing inside of me. You are the greatest gift giver! I look forward to meeting this little person You have sent our way. Thank You for providing health and joy for this baby already.

You are an awesome God! You are worthy of all my praise! I bless Your name!

Accomplishments

I always try to write these at night and never finish them because night time is not my time. I admit it, I am an early morning person. I always feel better and more productive when I get up and get myself going first thing in the AM. True, this doesn't necessarily always work with being pregnant. Sometimes I just want to sleep the day away.

It seems to me in the Bible that great things always got accomplished when they got up early in the morning. Those I read about were people of accomplishment especially the Proverbs 31 woman. I wonder why accomplishment is becoming such a big theme in my life right now. Maybe it's that I am 30 now. Maybe it's because I have no outside goal to accomplish. Perhaps the fact that I have to make my own way completely. I want my kids to be people of accomplishment and with me doing nothing I would be a really bad example. I need to focus in on what God has for me and run for it. I know being a Proverbs 31 woman is a major thing.

A while back I watched an episode of Joyce Meyers and got so inspired by a prayer she encouraged us all to pray. Then it fell by the wayside, but when I was cleaning my room this week I found it again and so I pray it today with all my heart.

Lord, show me what you would have of me. Speak Lord for your servant is listening that I might obey!

The Prayer

Today I take responsibility for my life. No more blaming, no more excuses; I take responsibility. It's a new day. I will never be the same. My past will not dictate my future. It stops right here with me. If anybody is going to do anything about my life, it's going to be me, so that I'm a responsible person!

Lord, I give you praise for enabling me to be all that you made me to be. I am Yours. I am ready to be used by You. Have Your way in my life. I will not hold You back from doing whatever You want to do with me.

James 1:22-25